Yesterday I listened to something that annoyed me. It bothered me so much I feel the need to jump on my computer and write about it.
I was listening to the radio and the presenters were talking about the Forbes Highest paid CEO’s and how much they earn a year. One of the presenters piped up with ” Yeah, but are they REALLY happy?” which took the conversation to a whole other place about how “rich people” sometimes might have all the money in the world but may not be truly happy.
I get so annoyed when I hear people talking like this. In fact, it is one of the things I most dislike about kiwi culture. Yes, I have heard that popular phrase ” Money can’t buy happiness” but, neither does being poor.
What is it about our culture that loves to tear people down? Success is good, but too much success is frowned upon and almost attacked in New Zealand. When I lived in Hawaii the culture was the total opposite. Success is viewed as a great thing, and if you were successful then people wanted to be like you!
I know that when we say things like ” Oh, they have all that money but are they really happy?” it is really a reflection of how we are feeling and we do it to protect ourselves. Instead, why don’t we let the success of other people inspire us to be a better version of ourselves.
From Marianne Williamson’s Return to Love: “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. … And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
I am not listed on the Forbes top CEO list, however I have experienced this in my life and found myself at times feeling guilty for my successes and blessings. Some of it was because of gossip and chatter that I could not only hear but FEEL from the people around me, and some of it was from my own head with statements I would manufacture for myself.
I truly believe that we do ourselves and all people a huge injustice every time we chop down another tall poppy, or when we hold ourselves back from growing tall.
Please share with me your experiences below. Have you ever experienced being a tall poppy? And how did you handle it?
It’s almost like New Zealanders are uncomfortable when others become successful. Lorde, Eleanor Catton and Lydia Ko are three women who have had massive success in their respected fields. Yet I have seen Lorde scrutinized by NZ public and media outlets while the other two have not received nearly the amount of recognition they deserve. New Zealand really needs to get rid of this ridiculous ‘humble’ mentality because it stops many from reaching their full potential! The success of others should be celebrated and used as motivation rather than played down or resented.
Great examples Shilo, and I agree. We do really well for a small country, but we could do EVEN BETTER if people didn’t feel the need to underperform to make those around them feel better. I saw it all the time as a teacher, and it’s so sad to think that we learn very young not to be the smart kid in class because that is the quickest way to lose friends.